The Glamorisation of being a Side Chick

In 2015, I wrote a blog titled “Where is her self respect?” after reading the autobiography of Faith Evans. After reading the details of Notorious BIG’s multiple affairs, I kinda thought to myself “did these women not respect or value themselves?” Read the blog here – http://natallie2008.blogspot.com/2015/03/where-is-her-self-respect.html?m=1#comment-form

A clip from the talk show ‘The Real’ along with some wisdom and life experience, has led me to wonder “why is the concept of being a side chick/dude appealing or even acceptable; let alone normalised or glamorised”

I agree with Adrienne and Tamera’s thoughts – I’m tired of people acting as if it’s impossible to be faithful or that they don’t have the option of walking away from a relationship if they’re truly that unhappy. Yes, it’s not always easy, especially if you have a life or family together but this is where communicating with your partner should happen.

I can’t even pretend it’s just men who cheat at this point coz we all know women are just as bad, so this is aimed at both male and female readers, none of y’all are innocent!

Being faithful is not impossible;yes, none of us are perfect; but some of us don’t even try. I guess this is because we all treat each other as disposable in this current era; it’s a shame but it’s true. Because of social media and dating apps etc; most of us look at relationships, both romantic and platonic, as easily replaceable; and to an extent they are but it’s never the same as what you threw away.

I still think it’s sad that a man or woman is happy to play second best; that is something I could never do, and it still makes me question do people not value themselves enough to confront their partner and hold them accountable? Obviously there are many side people who don’t know that they’re side people, but still, we need to do better as a whole!

Reality shows and social media are also heavily to blame, in my opinion. People seem to now target people that they know are in a relationship/married, all with the aim of exposing them to gain clout/fame. There has been many, many storylines on reality shows and headlines about these kind of people and I guess that’s why it may never end; it’s not like producers or publications are refusing to shed light on these people out of integrity, they’re just trying to create “entertaining” tv/get lots of views on their content.

The chance of becoming famous (depending on what you define as famous) or notorious for being a side person and potentially helping to wreck a family seems to be a huge incentive to people these days and it’s disgusting! It’s different if you meet someone who portrays themselves as being single and then you later find out or never find out, these people are obviously not at fault, but I’m talking about the scenario where a person knowingly engages with an unavailable person; whether it be for fame and clout or just because.

I just think people need to value themselves more, have a higher level of self respect and most Of all; STOP IGNORING RED FLAGS!! if your instincts are telling you something ain’t right then you’re probably right!